So, bad news, I don’t have a lot of photos for this blog. I have a few, but not many. Given the topic of shoes, feet, and politeness, it shouldn’t be surprising there are few photos. Typically, people find it weird when you ask if you can take pictures of their feet. They also look at you strangely if you mention their shoes. I like to think of myself as not being weird. Or at least, not that kind of weird. Now that I have sufficiently lowered your expectations, on with the blog! Thank you again for taking the time to read!
After a good night’s sleep, my first mission in the morning was to find a cup of coffee. I wandered into a local Thai business for coffee. I made the mistake of completely ignoring the shoe rack outside the establishment. Americans rarely take their shoes off after leaving the house. We really only take them off when we are back home for the day. The barista manning the counter took my order, but I could tell she was not exactly happy about something. I figured it was because I was sweating all over her establishment. Thailand is a very humid place. Sweat happens. In true Thai fashion, she made a passing reference to the shoe rack outside. In that moment, I realized my mistake; I didn’t take my shoes off before entering her establishment. I was so embarrassed that I left without my coffee. Later, I just picked up a cup at the 7-11 (still a good cuppa, if you’re curious). I learned something important in that visit. If you see shoes sitting outside, take your shoes off! Pro Tip: if you see lots of shoes outside a business, it means that locals are hanging out there, and whatever is inside is probably good.
Thais believe that feet are the dirtiest part of the body. Shoes are considered even worse and shouldn’t come into the house. This tradition dates back to ancient times when Thais went about their business barefoot. They would wash their feet in water buckets outside before entering anywhere indoors.
This aspect is so entrenched in Thai culture today that even students take their shoes off before entering their classrooms. It’s also not uncommon to see shoes outside of some businesses and all temples.
It also means not to put your feet up on the table; food and communal activities are conducted there. Nor should you put your feet up on the dashboard of your car. That’s where the guardian of the car resides. It’s disrespectful to her. The goddess guarding the cars here in Thailand is special. She is made of stuff tougher than other gods. But that’s a different post.
However, cultures are sometimes contradictory. It’s important to note that lowering oneself closer to an elder’s feet is a sign of great respect. Washing your parents’ or grandparents’ feet is also often seen as an honor. If you come from the Roman Catholic faith tradition, then this activity will sound familiar. I can remember many Masses where random parishioners went up to the altar and the priest washed their feet. At least one foot was washed, leaving one foot still dirty. Explain that bit of theological symbolism, Catholic Church! So back to Thai culture and feet. Here are the simple rules: Don’t point your feet at anyone. Avoid stepping over anyone, including animals, pillows, or other objects that food or your head might touch. Don’t show anyone the bottoms of your shoes. Doing any of these things is considered rude. Personally, I want to know more about why pointing your feet at people needs to be mentioned. What happened to make this a cultural faux pas? The truth is probably less exciting than my imagination, but inquiring minds and all that.
So, if feet are the dirtiest, is there a part of the body that is considered sacred? The answer to that is definitely yes! According to Buddhism, the head is the most sacred part of the body. So, you should never, ever, ever touch a Thai’s head, or their hair without permission. Ever. Don’t do it. Seriously. It’s weird, even by Western standards. Between the martial arts of “Thai Massage” and Muay Thai, these people have exceptional skills. These skills will incapacitate most westerners with minimal effort. Anecdotally, few people cross their legs here in Thailand. I suspect the relationship that Thais have with their feet and head is at the core of this belief.
Speaking of core behaviors. A good wai (pronounced “why”) will go along ways here. There are proper ways of doing it depending upon the age and hierarchy of the person you are addressing. However, this is the basics. (image credit in footnotes)
Just like the little boy who gave me a wai not long after I arrived in Thailand, everyone gives each other a wai when they are introduced. People do this as a sign of respect. Beyond introductions, they also wai when they greet each other or say goodbye. A wai is a handshake, and a hug all rolled into one gesture. It means hello, goodbye, thank you, I’ve missed you, let’s have lunch, and have a good day all rolled up into one gesture. So, when you’re out and about, give a wai to the clerk at the 7-11. Or, wai the grandma who sold you dinner from her street cart. Doing it while smiling will go a long way in ingratiating yourself with them and is just a part of society.
I reflect back on this part of Thai culture and wonder. Were Americans ever as polite as Thais are? On the whole, we’re a crude bunch. I see signs up in American hospitals, doctors’ offices, airports, and airplanes telling people to be nice to the person handling their needs. Why is that necessary? Shouldn’t nice and respectful just be the default? Those signs don’t exist here. Even with the trusty translator, I haven’t seen anything suggesting people need a reminder to be nice to each other, and I think we could learn a lesson from that. It might help us readjust our relationships with each other and the world. The Thais look out for each other through the lens of the greater good. Disagreements and conflicts happen. It’s an inevitable part of human nature, and Thais are not immune to that. Imagine what America could accomplish if we all simply respected and trusted each other enough to be nice to one another. If we understood our strength is in kindness and our character in politeness. Imagine if we were willing to meet everyone where they are. We should stop fetishizing the lone wolf or self-made man archetypes. We all need each other to make a society. The sooner we realize that, the better off we will be. Most Thais would find how we treat each other horribly egregious, and as Americans, we should too.
All of this to say, if you’re traveling in Thailand, don’t be a douchebag. Show the Thai people that you respect them, their culture, and their way of life. Show a genuine interest in their country and smile. If you do those things, they will introduce you to a side of Thailand that is unseen by tourists. Until next time, be kind to yourself, take care of each other, and stay curious. I’ll try to have more photos for my next post.
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